I believe that we can all create and live the life we want.
For some, that might sound very naive. When I ask why, then they usually say something like ‘we can’t control everything in life - we can’t control what happens’.
I agree, to a certain extent. There are definitely a lot of things that we can’t control. We can’t control how the weather will be tomorrow, we can’t control how our partner or kids behave, and we can’t control what challenges we face during the day. If you choose to focus on that, then I can understand why you believe that you can probably never live the life you want.
The thing is though, the importance lies in ‘if you choose…’ - that’s right - you have a choice! You can choose what to focus on. You can choose how you react. You can choose how you behave.
You can’t control the weather, but you can choose whether or not rain or shine will affect your mood. You can’t choose how people around you behave, but you can choose how you react and respond to them. You can’t control the challenges ‘Life’ throws at you, but you can choose whether or not to face them with a smile or a frown.
Sounds naive? Perhaps. Though, that doesn’t mean that it isn’t true.
We all have dreams and plans. Many of us stay in the ‘dreams’ for years, maybe even forever. We feel that we try so hard to get to where we want to be but ‘Life’ gets in the way. What does that even mean? It probably means that you blame other people and circumstances for your situation. It means that you have handed over the responsibility for your happiness to someone else. It means that you rely on others to make you happy and fulfilled. It means that you will probably never live your dreams.
I’m sorry to break it to you, but dreams don’t just come true because you spent your life dreaming about them. I know that’s what some fairytales tell us, but they are fairytales - not actual real life. I guess that’s why so many of us love fairytales and superhero stories! In a lot of these stories, amazing things happen to 'ordinary' people, and they don’t even have to do anything to become rich, a princess, a superhero etc (whatever it is you are dreaming about these days).
As much as I believe that we can all create and live the life we want, I don’t believe that it happens overnight and I don’t believe that it happens by accident. It happens because you are crystal clear on what you want, you have created a plan, and you are working purposefully towards it. You are willing to commit 100% to this goal, you are willing to do the work and you are willing to fail in order to succeed. It takes courage and constant effort and focus to succeed.
I know, that’s not what you want to hear. It would be so much easier if there was a magic pill that we could all take and voilà - we are all living out our dreams! If it was easy, sure we would all be doing it, right? Right! So first of all - do you know what you want? (If not, that’s ok - read my blog post from last week about ‘What if You don't know what you want?'). Secondly - are you 100% committed to achieving that goal? I mean, are you willing and ready to do the work? That means, showing up, facing your fears, hustling, being brave, putting yourself out there and creating the changes that you need to create in order to achieve your goals.
You may even need to become a different person! Well, if your goal is in true alignment with your values, beliefs and gut instinct, then you don’t need to become a ‘different’ person but you may need to step up and step in to your own shoes. It’s easy to stay small and just follow the flow. It’s much harder to stand out from the crowd, go against the stream and create your dream life. That’s what you got to do though, if you want to create and live the life you want. That’s the person you need to become.
Why is it so hard? As mentioned, it’s easier to ‘fit in’. It’s easier to follow society’s norms because that is what is expected of you. It’s much harder to stop and tune in to yourself and look at what it is that you really want. Because, what you really want, may not be what the norm is. I am not necessarily talking about world-rocking lifestyles here - I am also talking about more down-to-earth goals. Many people I talk to want to live at a slower pace, spend more time with their family - it sounds like a cliché - because many people talk about it but so few people actually create a life where they have it! They get caught up in dreaming about it and talking about it and blaming their boss/their job/their partner/etc for not having it.
Though, the point here is that - it is not their responsibility. Your happiness - whatever that means to you - is not the responsibility of your partner, your boss, your children, your friends…It is your responsibility. You are the only person in the world who truly knows what you want. You are also the only person in the world who can make that happen. You need to take responsibility for your life, for your happiness, if you want to achieve your dreams and create and live the life you want.
And it starts now, today. Your dream life starts right here, right now. It doesn’t happen some time in the distant future (that you dream about but which never actually happens) - it starts right here, today, with you deciding to take responsibility and making it happen.
Do you want to live out your dreams?
Are you ready?
Are you committed?
Then start. Now.
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